The first 24 years of my life
01:09
How do I put 24 years of my life down in black & white?
Eddie was such an outgoing and positive man in every sense of the word. Anyone who knows him can vouch for that. He always looked out for number one, which to him was everybody else. He would drop everything to help someone, whether they were close to him or not. Always making sure everyone else was OK before worrying about himself. That was one of his traits that people loved about him. He was always there to lend a hand if things were tough or if anyone needed a shoulder to cry on, he was there. Eddie touched so many peoples lives and he probably didn't even know. A "true gentleman" is what people are calling him and that is exactly what he was.
Eddie was so passionate about politics as most people know. God, he used to drive me nuts at home about it, especially the water charges. But he wasn't afraid to have his voice heard and express his opinion. As so many people keep saying he "He was a fighter for the cause" and that could not be more true.
Eddie loved cycling. He started cycling to get back fit as his knees were fecked from road running for years. So he took up cycling to get healthier and lose weight. But over time it became such a huge part of his life. If I got home and he wasn't there, he was more than likely out on the bike. Last year Eddie started taking part in charity cycles and he just love it. He was doing two things he felt so passionate about, cycling and helping others. This year he even took part in "The Sean Kelly Tour of Waterford" & I could not have been more proud of him.
Saturday the 5th of September, Eddie went on a charity cycle "The GAZ Cycle" for the charity CRY (Cardiac Risk in the Young). Below is a picture taken at the Woodlands Hotel in Waterford before the cycle began. Eddie is to the right of the guy in the florescent top. He is wearing his cycling glasses, with his thumbs up. He could not have been happier.
But unfortunately Eddie never got to finish the cycle. On that beautiful Saturday morning my dad's heart took it's last beat. Eddie passed away doing what he loved and had an amazing friend by his side.
Eddie was known for all these things and so much more. But to me, he was my dad. My superhero. My problem solver. He was the best father anyone could ever want or need. He was right there for me and my sister and he supported us 100% in everything we did. So many people have spoke over the past few weeks about how much dad loved me and Robyn, how he never stopped talking about us. But the thing is we know. We both know how much he loved and cared about us because he showed it every single day. He was the person we both rang if something went wrong or we needed help to get through something. But it's now that we need to ring him and ask him what do we do now because he's meant to tell us what the next step is. Even now we both are still waiting for the phone to ring and he'll be on the other end.
Dad was Robyn's number one fan when it came to all the show's she was in. He was at every single one of them and made sure he had the best seat to see his incredible daughter on stage and now he does, he has the best seat in the house. Dad always told us he would love to be in panto. He would have us in the knots trying to do impressions, which to be fair weren't all that bad. He always wanted to be involved in Theatrebox stage school as much as he could. He walked in the St.Patrick's Day parade with the school taking photographs for them. Dad was also thinking about joining the adult acting classes. Now that would of been something to see. He was so proud of Robyn, watching her grow with confidence on the stage as the years went on. He supported her the whole way.
Dad gave Robyn an incredible and unforgettable 18 years of her life, that she is never going to forget.
As for me, what can I say. I've not only lost my dad, I've also lost my best friend. To be honest, i don't know what I'm going to do without him. Myself and dad were very similar as most already know. We used to be effin' and blinding at each other one minute and laughing about it ten minutes later. That's why I think we had such a close relationship because we were both so similar. And i loved that. Not many people can say their dad was their best friend, but i can and I am so proud to be able to say it.
In 2011, I finally came out about having a mental illness. Dad was the first person I told and he could not have been more supportive. He even came into the doctor with me when it all came out. And never left my side. Dad helped me so much, more than he probably ever knew.
In 2013 I had spoke publicly about suffering with depression in silence since I was 15. I wrote a blog post about what I went through and again, dad could not of done enough for me. He was 100% behind me and was so proud of me for doing it.
Last month I decided I would set up a new blog about my journey over the next couple of months in my last year of college and everything else in between. My dad was my biggest advocate when it came to my blog especially this one now. He brought me off one or two times to take photographs with his camera for it. He was the one who pushed me to keep going with it and when he passed away I was going to throw in the towel but I knew he wouldn't of wanted me to do that.
So here I am now typing up my first blog post in weeks and the irony of it is, that it's about him. My dad. When I choose the name of my blog "Grey Skies and Silver Linings" I never thought the name would mean as much to me as it does now.
So as I said before, how do I put 24 years of my life in black and white? The answer is, I can't. I could never do it because there is just so many memories that I am going to treasure for the rest of my life. That are too precious to put down.
Eddie was known for all these things and so much more. But to me, he was my dad. My superhero. My problem solver. He was the best father anyone could ever want or need. He was right there for me and my sister and he supported us 100% in everything we did. So many people have spoke over the past few weeks about how much dad loved me and Robyn, how he never stopped talking about us. But the thing is we know. We both know how much he loved and cared about us because he showed it every single day. He was the person we both rang if something went wrong or we needed help to get through something. But it's now that we need to ring him and ask him what do we do now because he's meant to tell us what the next step is. Even now we both are still waiting for the phone to ring and he'll be on the other end.
Dad was Robyn's number one fan when it came to all the show's she was in. He was at every single one of them and made sure he had the best seat to see his incredible daughter on stage and now he does, he has the best seat in the house. Dad always told us he would love to be in panto. He would have us in the knots trying to do impressions, which to be fair weren't all that bad. He always wanted to be involved in Theatrebox stage school as much as he could. He walked in the St.Patrick's Day parade with the school taking photographs for them. Dad was also thinking about joining the adult acting classes. Now that would of been something to see. He was so proud of Robyn, watching her grow with confidence on the stage as the years went on. He supported her the whole way.
Dad gave Robyn an incredible and unforgettable 18 years of her life, that she is never going to forget.
As for me, what can I say. I've not only lost my dad, I've also lost my best friend. To be honest, i don't know what I'm going to do without him. Myself and dad were very similar as most already know. We used to be effin' and blinding at each other one minute and laughing about it ten minutes later. That's why I think we had such a close relationship because we were both so similar. And i loved that. Not many people can say their dad was their best friend, but i can and I am so proud to be able to say it.
In 2011, I finally came out about having a mental illness. Dad was the first person I told and he could not have been more supportive. He even came into the doctor with me when it all came out. And never left my side. Dad helped me so much, more than he probably ever knew.
In 2013 I had spoke publicly about suffering with depression in silence since I was 15. I wrote a blog post about what I went through and again, dad could not of done enough for me. He was 100% behind me and was so proud of me for doing it.
Last month I decided I would set up a new blog about my journey over the next couple of months in my last year of college and everything else in between. My dad was my biggest advocate when it came to my blog especially this one now. He brought me off one or two times to take photographs with his camera for it. He was the one who pushed me to keep going with it and when he passed away I was going to throw in the towel but I knew he wouldn't of wanted me to do that.
So here I am now typing up my first blog post in weeks and the irony of it is, that it's about him. My dad. When I choose the name of my blog "Grey Skies and Silver Linings" I never thought the name would mean as much to me as it does now.
So as I said before, how do I put 24 years of my life in black and white? The answer is, I can't. I could never do it because there is just so many memories that I am going to treasure for the rest of my life. That are too precious to put down.
I am not one to say goodbye, i never have been.
My whole life has been turned upside down and the pain is just as bad as it was nearly a month ago. But I know he's not far away and is with me everyday, giving me the strength to take on this tough journey.
So dad, this is not "goodbye". It's just "see you soon".
Sleep tight my angel. I love you to the moon and back.
J x
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